I, too, used to use the word “bashert” because my mother did and my grandmother did.
To my friend, Marge:
There are times when we may want to believe it couldn’t be anything else but “meant to be“; when a series of events and the outcome fit together like hand and glove. It can be so comforting and righteous. But, in the end, I do not believe in predestination. What may seem to be “bashert” is just coincidence. As a humanist, I cannot rationally attribute circumstances to non-human forces.
Speaking metaphorically, it’s like having to get out from under a nice warm blanket and stepping out into the cold. But, such is life, and cold is invigorating (once you get used to it).
I am, however, only one person; and this is one person’s opinion.